Drowning in Data

 

GPS Device

The reviews kept popping up. Everything from the music to which I listened, to my favorite day to visit the convenience store, to the posted photo which received the most likes, to the total number of steps measured by my fitness tracker; my 2023 was neatly summarized.as compiled data Along with the summary was the challenge to do more in 2024.

If it wasn't for all of the devices and associated apps these summaries would be nonexistent in my life. Recording and tracking day-to-day activities isn't high on my list of priorities. The phrase, "If you don't document it, it never happened." hasn't established a foothold in my routine. The desire to be spontaneous, to wander and wonder, to flit around my environment continues to override the recording of daily details. "This is a character deficiency to be corrected." was the advice of a career counselor from decades ago. "You need to control your wanderlust." was added later in the session. I realized the truth in these statements years later as a chaplain in a healthcare system. Documentation was vital, even though my visits were not reimbursable nor did most medical staff read what I scribed. As a way of thumbing my nose at the system, I defended that narrative jottings were stifling my ability to spontaneously interact with patients and staff. My sense of freedom became encased in data keeping. My freedom was regained as I was informed that my services were no longer needed. A character deficiency not corrected cut deep into my sense of worth. The counselor's word, heard but not heeded crushed my core.

There may not be more in 2024 other than continued enjoyment of spontaneity. Wanderlust cultivates 

Icy Beauty

creativity in my spirit. Being randomly sidetracked and captured by a distraction instead of being relentlessly focused on a result is the invitation I am accepting. My creativity cannot be manufactured by rules and algorithms. It organically erupts out of curiosity. The idiom, "Curiosity killed the cat," continues with "but satisfaction brought it back." Maybe there is more to the resurrection concept than the Christian motif of an empty tomb on Easter?

White wonders

The photos and video accompanying these words are from a recent trek at Buffalo River State Park. I wanted to exercise away from the sidewalks and streets around the apartment. I had a goal of steps to accomplish according to an invisibly manufactured number buried within the microscopic world attached to my wrist. The winter setting, instead of being an environment to use for my personal achievement transformed into a studio in which to admire the beauty encompassing me. I was able to subdue not only the goal generated by the gadget, but more significantly my internal impulse to measure personal value by documenting physical activity. 

Windswept Frost

Also in 2024, I plan to use social media sparingly. Instagram and Facebook will become cyber bulletin boards directing people to my blog and YouTube channel. Eventually I will cease using the aforementioned platforms even as directional connectors. Thus you can decide how to access my writings and videos. Sundays will continue to be the day on which I post. 

Thank you for reading!                                      

Enjoyable + Creative

Chocolate Chip Caramel Bars
They need work.

My mother was non-traditional. She did not fit into a predetermined mold. Cooking, cleaning, and laundry were activities everyone could and would do. Of those tasks I gravitated toward cooking. Maybe it came from my desire to eat, but I also enjoyed the creativity and experimentation associated with cooking. The machinery and mechanics of the farm held little interest for me. Cooking? Yup, I could do that and enjoy it! Rarely did I throw my work into the trash. Even if it did not come out as intended or look like the picture attached to the recipe, it could usually be consumed. 

The enjoyment of cooking continued. It cycled from creative to common. With the arrival of a family there were times when basic foods needed to be prepared. The reality of places to go and activities to attend meant that culinary creativity was shelved for the sake of consuming calories and sating hunger. Added to this was the 

Prehistoric pressed chicken

changing palate of the children. Dino Nuggets, mac and cheese, and tots were in the rotation along with corn dogs and frozen pizza. Creativity crept into the corner and covered its eyes!  However, it was enjoyable to be with my children. Creativity transferred into the art of parenting.

Currently there is a push for perfection in many aspects of life. Restaurant quality, chef curated cookware is promoted. Subscriptions to meal services provide gourmet ingredients and instructions. Competition, whether it be on a cable channel or social media is normative. Unique, one-of-a-kind adventure vacations need to be a part of family life. If not, we run the risk of just being ordinary. The mantra which is not subtle is, "Live your best life." I see this in part as capitalism working its magic. Without projecting a need which has to be filled or a deficiency for which restoration is necessary, products would not be sold. We are prodded and brainwashed 

Cover of my calendar 

into believing that our best life is a few purchases, a few experiences, or a few investments away. I believe the questions need to be asked: When will the illusive best become reality? Who decides what is best for me? How will I know when I have reached my best? What if my best already occurred? Is the concept of best meant to be a fluctuating destination so that feelings of inadequacy drive me to increase spending? Can the best be purchased? 
        

I believe there is a marked difference between stagnation and activity. Does improvement in education, salary, housing, and possessions with the increase in activity which is necessary for these things to occur provide the measurement toward becoming my best? I also sense there is a belief that acquiring and strictly following formulaic instructions will provide the desired outcome. All of this striving, all of this vision narrowing is performed at the expense of enjoyment and creativity. I ask myself often, "Tim, did you experience some enjoyment today?" Creativity, in my opinion cannot be stringently defined. However, it can be applied to all activities. Creativity and enjoyment are intertwined. I enjoyed the process of attempting to layer caramel over a bed of cookie dough and covering it with cookie dough topping. The outcome was not what I anticipated. It was an experiment. If attempted again I will change a few things. However, it was enjoyable on many levels. One of which is a dentist's dream whether it be producing cavities or pulling loose a filling! The infusion of sugar into the blood stream has some enjoyment, too. I chose not measure this baking venture in terms of my best. It was simply an enjoyable and creative enterprise. 

I may be more like my mother than I care to admit. I have no desire to fit into a "best" mold. I would much rather enjoy the journey while being creative in the process.

     

Wanderlust

 

A meaningful gift I received!

Three congregational settings in 5 years triggered the District staff to suggest I consult a counselor to investigate those moves. The suggested counselor was a pastor with specific training in mental health. After asking, listening, and contemplating the counselor stated that I have a "spirit of wanderlust." The counselor suggested if I neglected to reign in this aspect of my character the chances of longevity in pastoral ministry would be limited. I would appear, at least on paper as "too unstable." I wanted to continue being a pastor. My skill set was fairly limited to explore other vocations. My wife and I wanted to start a family. Someone needed to provide income, health insurance, and all of those things that provide for the typical, stable family. Thus I discovered ways and disciplined myself to suppress my wanderlust and act like a professional. 

Stiff & lifeless!

Everything can be suppressed. However, I had bouts when suppression seemed futile. If wanderlust was an intrinsic characteristic why was I attempting to lock it away? What about using it in a creative manner? Could it be enhancing instead of detrimental? I was provided opportunities to facilitate groups in spirituality, the first 4 Steps in Alcoholics Anonymous, and working with "at risk" teenagers in a Middle School setting. Instead of the usual droning of instruction I attempted to be more interactive and engaging. Given the task of enhancing morale at a healthcare facility where I worked as a chaplain, the other chaplains and myself provided root beer floats to staff as they came to their vehicles at the end of shift on a Friday afternoon.  Not to be forgotten, treats were personally delivered to staff working the other shifts. No group was to be neglected. It took time and creativity, but it was a morale booster. Yes, I received push-back from some administrators and peers, but it was worth it!  As most of my parish ministry has been in smaller congregations, I have taken advantage of props and nontraditional delivery methods for sermons. Maybe the message's details became clouded at times, but people remembered the overall theme in the days ahead. The willing and drive to seek out and create adventure in diverse aspects of life continues. Maybe it is now less threatening to others as I can be labeled a "crazy old person." It is now less damaging to my ego and job prospects!

Frozen Otter Ultra Trek finisher.

I sense the tension between staying within normative expectations and developing personal characteristics continues to exist. This is not the same as pushing personal agendas onto others. It is not imposing one set of characteristics as the only way to function in society. Those ways have and continue to be foisted and forced upon others. This generates anger, division, and an "us verses them" mindset.  Instead of being told to suppress characteristics, the opportunity to develop them creatively should be a priority?  This could make strong inter-personal connections a reality. It could foster more creativity in possible solutions for the imbalances in society and environment. As the adage goes, if we only color within the lines we only get what was already outlined on the page. 

There are days when I enjoy allowing the wanderlust to roam free. It takes my body and mind in areas of unseen beauty and exploration. It is in these adventures away from prescribed norms where I sense both freedom and fulfillment. As I progress away from the "make-a-living" aspect of life the wanderlust tugs me into "why not give it a try!"

My advice: no matter what age or stage of life explore and develop your characteristics and character!

White Mountains in Vermont

Staying within the boundaries, submitting to someone else's norms may define you as "normal", but are you really normal? We are all unique, precious, and priceless beings created by an adventurous God.