Potato - Potahto

Wedding Party - 40 years ago

September is one of my favorite months for many reasons. One of  which is the recognition of my marriage.  (YouTube Channel link)  This month is also gaining popularity with other couples as  indicated by a wedding I am conducting.

In years past most "legitimate" wedding ceremonies occurred within the confines of a church building. The idea was God's blessing on a couple would only occur within the walls of a church building. Also, an ordained clergy person, appropriate music, and dignified conduct were indicative of the sacred and in some traditions sacramental ceremony. Plus, the venue was free or relatively inexpensive while being familiar to most people.

Hillsboro United Parish

I do not remember a particular time when the wedding ceremony, venue, and structure began to change. However, the change, in my estimation has been significant. Rarely are wedding ceremonies conducted in church settings. Numerous venues abound in urban and rural settings. Now most church buildings charge a fee for members and non-members alike. There is often a list of "dos + don'ts" that is significantly greater within a church than in the rented venue. Officiants (no longer limited to clergy) can instantly receive online, legal credentials to satisfy the laws of individual states to sign a marriage license. The comfort level provided to those attending in a venue setting is greater and often more familiar than in a religious structure. Music is unrestricted. It is as diverse as the DJ's ability to download from a streaming service. 

Setting for recent ceremony.

The ceremony in which I was most recently involved included the couples' canine as the "flower + ring bearer." The outdoor venue in a quiet, rural, farm setting fit the nature of the couple. The relative simplicity along with the venues cats, chickens, fruit trees, and fall garden produce provide a unique and relaxed setting. Plus, the fee included multiple days for set up and take down without feeling rushed to get out of the way for the next event. 

Which setting is more appropriate for a wedding ceremony? Is God's consecration of a union greater in a structure set aside for religious functions or a repurposed barn and farm? Is there a correlation between setting and sanctity which directly impacts the longevity of the relationship? Is there a benefit to an officially recognized religious professional conducting the ceremony? 

Reception/meal area

My perspective is found in today's title. The ceremony and setting are not the basis of a relationship. Who is chosen to speak words, manage the flow of the event, and sign a civil, legal, government document has minimal impact on a relationship which began months or years previous. Money spent to facilitate and entertain a gathering of family and friends does not provide dividends which keep a relationship strong yet flexible. It is the willingness of a couple to understand the changing dynamics of a relationship over time which is important. The family and friends are to be mentors. They provide applicable interpersonal resources to assist the couple in daily decision making. And surrounding all of these dimensions is the grace-filled, forgiveness focused presence of God.  The gifts or blessings of the Divine are not limited to place or person. God's ability to positively impact the pleasure and perseverance of the relationship cannot be relegated or regulated. 

Life and relationships are continuously commingled. I discover perplexity and promise both by being in relationship and publicly celebrating the journey of others in their relationships! This cannot be contained by place, custom, or language. 

Valley of Fire State Park  (northeast of Las Vegas NV)

Time Perspectives

Zion National Park

In not much more than 50 hours I lead worship, cleaned a few miles of road ditch, hiked in two areas near Las Vegas, and began another hike in southwestern Utah. From the dancing, kodachromatic fountains at the Bellagio and turbulence along the Vegas Strip to being awakened by a rooster crow, bright sunlight filtering through the trailer's curtains, and the serenity of outdoor morning coffee in northwestern Arizona, I am grateful for the variety of settings in which I live life. Being fortunate is not an appropriate expression. Being privileged is a major factor in the equation. The opportunity to spend time with friends and  especially immediate family is something greater than I ever envisioned and beyond the capacity of words. 

Climbing with a view

Even in a desert region ample diversity is found. The bright magenta of beavertail cacti blossoms boldly stand out among the browns, tans, and light greens. Ascending from the canyon bottom spruce roots cling onto cliff sides; chipmunks scurry along the ground and ascend crevices like skilled climbers; while gusts of winds allow both for evaporation and a need to grab one's cap. Along with the diversity of nature are the diversity of people. Bright eyed young adults in jeans and flip flops anxiously begin their hike. Senior senior citizens with clicking trekking poles and a constant cadence ascend and descend like it is second nature. Other fit people use the trails for their running adventures. One couple, ascending from an overnight or two

Grand Canyon

in the bottom of the Grand Canyon appeared oblivious to others, looking as if they were on a death march. Their minds, their eyes, their spirits did not realize the top was eleven switchbacks away. For them it may have seemed like a hundred.

Valley of Fire State Park

The Grand Canyon, while massive and awe inspiring, also seemed distant and a bit irrelevant. The spectrum of color was narrow. Distinguishing distances and depth of filed proved difficult because of the absence of color differentiation.  Along a portion of the paved Rim Trail, rocks were displayed with estimated time of formation. This increased my perception difficulties significantly. Even as a college history major, I have difficulty comprehending 1,000 million years ago. The current reality, book-ended by a couple of hundred years is understandable in a time perspective. However, to speak of millions of years past has no relevance in my mind. 

Northern Arizona Trailer

The wanderlust of exploration has been a part of my being. The ability to see, ask questions, and broaden perspectives from interacting with others is vital to my well being. I live in the present, influenced by the past, and moving into the future.  What is vital is experiencing the current setting and pondering the possibilities. I am grateful beyond words for these opportunities, especially with significant family members.